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Aristotle

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chele_yntema

Complex trauma & dissociation specialist | Trauma-focused, somatic, relational psychotherapy | Brisbane southside

Repost from @embodiedwithmichelle • One thing I’ve

Repost from @embodiedwithmichelle
•
One thing I’ve noticed after years of watching people navigate relationships:

The most significant shifts rarely happen when someone learns a new communication skill.

They happen when something fundamentally changes what feels normal.

Most people explain this as: “My standards got higher.”

Sometimes that’s true.

But I think something deeper is usually happening.

Because what I’ve seen over and over is that once someone experiences genuine consideration, consistency, attunement, accountability, or relational generosity...

they don’t just become less willing to tolerate less. They become less able to pretend less feels good.

That’s an important distinction.

The common explanation is that people become more demanding. More guarded. Harder to please.

What I usually see is something else.

Their nervous system has experienced a different baseline.

And once the nervous system learns what safety feels like, it starts recognizing the places where safety is repeatedly absent.

Because repetition creates expectation.

The nervous system trusts what gets rehearsed.

This is also why awareness alone so often fails to create change.

Most people already understand far more than they’re able to live.

They already know what’s happening. And yet they find themselves participating in the same dynamics again. Because insight can explain a pattern.

It cannot automatically interrupt one. Capacity does that.

The ability to tolerate accountability without collapsing into defense.

The ability to remain connected when disappointment, discomfort, responsibility, or repair enters the room.

And this is where the conversation gets uncomfortable.

Because healthy love doesn’t just change what you’re willing to receive. It changes what you’re willing to contribute. What you’re willing to practice. What you’re willing to participate in.

once that expansion happens, the standard doesn’t go back down. Because understanding your old survival patterns doesn’t stop you from recreating them.

Building the capacity to participate differently does.

This is so true - to sit alongside someone, go bar

This is so true - to sit alongside someone, go bare witness to the depth of others sadness, pain, joy, and humanity is such an honour to me.

There could be nothing more tender nor precious than what is offered within the sacred spaces of the room I work.

I am truly truly blessed to bare witness to the stories of such courageous people. May they always know and feel just how deeply I feel them.

Repost from @heymom.co
•
What a fragile and tender gift.

#therapy #trauma #cptsd #ptsd humanity

Repost from @haileypaigemagee • I promise ⁠— you’r

Repost from @haileypaigemagee
•
I promise ⁠— you’re in good company if you’ve been needing firmer boundaries during this time of change.

Transition is a LOT.

You’re releasing an old identity.
The future you thought you’d live is gone.

Your beliefs about yourself, others, and the world are shifting.

And on top of these internal shifts are the external ones⁠—shifts in routine, location, habit.

#boundaries #trauma #cptsd #therapy

Repost from @kayatoastforthesoul.sg • For those of

Repost from @kayatoastforthesoul.sg
•
For those of you struggling with a harsh inner critic, maybe you know this feeling too.

That voice inside your head that always seems to find another flaw.

Another mistake.

Another reason to feel ashamed.

The voice that says:

“Don’t embarrass yourself.”
“You should’ve done better.”
“Don’t be too much.”

And after a while, it can really start to feel like your own mind has turned against you.

—

But I hope this post is making you wonder…

Why does this part even exist in the first place?

Because if our minds are meant to help us survive, what purpose would self-hatred even serve?

Why would a part of us spend so much time criticising us, pressuring us, pushing us, making us feel small?

—

I don’t think most inner critics begin from cruelty.

Maybe somewhere along the way, this part of us simply learned that mistakes were dangerous.

That rejection hurt. That criticism hurt. That being “not good enough” came with consequences.

So maybe it started watching us carefully.

Trying to correct us before someone else could.

Trying to push us harder so we would not fail, be rejected, or be abandoned.

Not because it actually hated us.

But because somewhere deep down, it became afraid for us.

—

And I know this probably won’t change things completely.

But maybe it changes something small.

Maybe instead of only seeing this part as an enemy, we begin noticing that it might also be tired.

Tired from carrying fear for such a long time.

And maybe healing is not learning how to hate this part less violently.

Maybe it’s slowly helping it realise that we no longer need fear and shame just to deserve love or belonging.

And maybe it’s a wonderful start to pause for a moment and gently notice:

“Something inside me is hurting again.”

And maybe that moment of noticing— without shame, without punishment— is already the beginning of something different.

You got this,
Hernping

💙

For my client’s inner critic she calls “Elmo”.

Thank you for trying so hard to protect mama.

I hope you like your new job now.

Care.

And love.

#innerchild #trauma #therapy #insideout #cptsd

Long before words form, there is often a sensing i

Long before words form, there is often a sensing in us, a recognition, a felt knowing that something does not seem okay.

It moves through the body as a tightening, a bracing, a turning toward caution and toward what a part of us already knows to be true.

For many of us, we learned early that this knowing would be overridden, spoken past, smoothed over by voices more certain than our own.

What our bodies sensed was real, and still the moment was named as nothing to worry about, or something to question.

When this happens enough, a part of us may begin to doubt its own clear sight, to apologise for it, to fold it down into something more agreeable so the relationship around us can stay steady.

Yet even amidst the doubt and the apology, that knowing has always remained.

It has been faithful, loyal, steadfast, calling for a slow returning toward trusting it again, toward letting our own sensing hold weight alongside the voices around us.

Not all at once, simply a steady movement of integrity that honours the felt sense of Self as something that can be a little more our own.

#trauma #therapy #body #sense #self

Repost from @michellcclark • Somewhere along the w

Repost from @michellcclark
•
Somewhere along the way, a lot of us got trained to treat our own instincts like an inconvenience. 
So we override our gut feelings. We laugh off the red flags.   We apologize for noticing exactly what we noticed. We say “I’m probably overthinking it” when we’re actually thinking about it the exact right amount.

You know the feeling.

Something happens, and your whole body goes quiet in that specific way—and then you spend the next three days arguing yourself out of what you already knew to be true. You replay the conversation. You build the case for why you’re wrong. You hand the verdict over to people who weren’t even in the room with you when your intuition spoke.

And the wildest part? You had it right the whole time. Clarity showed, up right on schedule—in the first three seconds, before anyone else got a vote.

Then the room became filled with other people’s certainty, and you let it drown out your own. There’s a difference between not knowing the truth and getting talked out of it, and most of us have spent years living in that gap—exhausted, second-guessing, calling our clarity “drama” because somebody once made us feel unsafe for having it.

The next time everyone says “it’s fine” when you know it’s not, believe yourself first. Write the feeling down before you let anyone negate it. You learn to trust yourself gradually, one honest “no” at a time.

Your discernment has been right more often than you give it credit for. It’s been trying to protect you this whole time. The least you can do is start listening back.

#body #wisdom #feelings #listen #therapy

Repost from @lexyflorentina • Loving reminder ❤️ i

Repost from @lexyflorentina
•
Loving reminder ❤️ if you’ve been in an inner battle with parts of yourself for a long time, let this be your permission slip to remember that there is nothing inherently wrong with you. That no part of you is broken, or bad, or unworthy. And the pursuit to fix any part of yourself is always a signal that that part is one that likely needs the most love 🤍

#not #broken #trauma #reminder #innerbattle

Repost from @innerwomanrising • Celebrating women

Repost from @innerwomanrising
•
Celebrating women for all their unseen moments... Someone should have witnessed you.

We get that here @innerwomanrising
More than a page we’re a sisterhood. 💛👑😘

#woman #women #empowerment

Repost from @itsmaggiehayes • Dissociation is one

Repost from @itsmaggiehayes
•
Dissociation is one of the most brilliant survival strategies we have.

It’s quiet, small, and can go largely undetected.

But it holds great power.

Power so great that even we ourselves can easily learn to live with it.

But when you notice you’ve left, and you want to come back, there are ways to start gently rebuilding connection 💙

Your system, over time, can learn that it doesn’t need to disappear in order to be safe.

#dissociation #trauma #therapy #cptsd

Repost from @christabelmintahnwankwo • You are not

Repost from @christabelmintahnwankwo
•
You are not negotiating your humanity like it’s a group project.

Repair requires willingness. If someone refuses accountability, keeps denying what happened, and still expects access to you, that is not a repair situation.

That is where you stop begging them to see it and start showing up fully anyway.

Wear the red lipstick. Bring your partner. Tell the truth. Stop shrinking so people can stay comfortable with your erasure.

#truth #repair #justice #hurt #relationships

Repost from @healing.the.mosaic • Dissociation can

Repost from @healing.the.mosaic
•
Dissociation can show up in ways many people don’t realise. These are just some of the experiences people may have, but everyone’s experience is different. Which of these do you relate to the most? 🫶

#Dissociation
#Derealisation
#Depersonalisation
#trauma #therapy

Repost from @avellinofarms • You’ll see a lot of h

Repost from @avellinofarms
•
You’ll see a lot of hate on the internet over the next month as people freely share their version of love with us. It’s important that we don’t stay silent when nasty comments appear.

The reason Pride Month exists is because there was a time when simply existing as your authentic self could cost you your job, your family, your safety, or even your life. Visibility wasn’t created to make others uncomfortable. It was created because people spent generations being told they should remain invisible.

You don’t have to understand someone’s journey to respect their humanity. Kindness costs nothing. Dignity costs nothing. Standing up for people when they are being treated unfairly costs very little, but it can mean everything to someone who feels alone.

If hate can flow so freely on this platform without consequence then so can love. If you see someone being targeted for just being themselves, stand with them. Because love has never been the problem. Hate always has been.

✌️ & ❤️

#love #hate #alone #dignity #pride

Repost from @iambraveandfree • If you live with CP

Repost from @iambraveandfree
•
If you live with CPTSD - save this. Share it with someone who loves you and doesn’t always know how. Or tag someone you wish would read it.

Because sometimes people want to show up for the people they love. They just don’t always know what that looks like when trauma is in the room.

#trauma #support #cptsd #brave #free

Repost from @theeqschool • self-awareness in actio

Repost from @theeqschool
•
self-awareness in action—
it’s attuning to your body, your feelings, and becoming acquainted with your unique signals that let you know how you’re feeling in any given moment.

It’s recognizing when your energy dips, when you feel unsafe, when something is not okay with you.

It’s also recognizing what makes you feel connected, calm, and like yourself and noting what conditions consistently make this possible.

It’s, over time, trying different ways of responding to yourself and finding what works for you.

Throughout our entire lives we do this this through trial and error - we try things and see how they feel.

But to become more regulated, you have to be present with what is —
you have to learn how to attune to your body, to slow down and notice when you’re feeling reactive or shutting down without immediately having to fix, judge, understand, or change it.

Just being able to notice is a giant step toward creating more internal safety in your own body.

Because regulation isn’t about a daily cold plunge or meditation practice, per se — it’s about learning how to witness and response to yourself safely.

It’s building the self-trust to use your discernment to know when to use what tool, or when to just let yourself move through something.

Because when we’re present and we allow ourselves to the ride the waves of activation with safety and compassion, the wave will move through us.

#awareness #self #trauma #therapy #emotions

Repost from @jordandann • In my newest essay I tak

Repost from @jordandann
•
In my newest essay I take Goldilocks back to where the story actually begins — not the bears’ house, but her own. Through the lens of early attachment, narcissistic character structure, and the clinical wisdom of Winnicott, Ogden, Levine, and Benjamin, I explore what it means to live inside the relentless hunger for exactly right — and what it costs the people who love you.

This one is for anyone who has ever felt impossible to reach. And for anyone who has exhausted themselves trying.

https://open.substack.com/pub/jordandannsomatictherapist/p/i-cant-get-it-right-on-loving-someone?r=1uv0lb&utm_medium=ios

#narcissist #trauma #attachment #therapy

Post by @kayatoastforthesoul.sg One thing many p

Post by @kayatoastforthesoul.sg

One thing many people ask me after going through a painful relationship, friendship, or family rupture is this:

“Why do I keep searching for an explanation?”

“Why am I still waiting for an answer?”

“Why can’t I let go?”

And I think many people judge themselves harshly for this.

They think it means they’re unstable. Obsessive.
Unable to move on.

But often, what they are actually searching for is not just information.

It’s safety.

—

Because when someone leaves suddenly,
withdraws emotionally, goes silent,
or hurts us without repair—

The mind keeps searching for something that will help the pain settle.

An explanation.
An apology.
A final conversation.

Or even just an acknowledgement.

Something that tells our nervous system:

“You can stop bracing now.”
“You can stop waiting.”
“You can stop trying to make sense of this.”

And sometimes, that answer never comes.

—

Why don’t we get the answer we need?

Many reasons.

People avoiding accountability.
Avoiding conflict.
Choosing ghosting because it feels easier.

Selfishness.
Emotional immaturity.
Avoidance.

No matter the reason, it can feel unbearable for the person left behind.

But for many clients of mine, over time, healing becomes something deeper than finally getting the explanation they thought they needed.

Because sometimes even getting an answer did not give them the closure they were hoping for.

Sometimes closure is the moment we finally realise:

“I am not trapped there anymore.”

“And nobody gets to keep hurting me now.”

That’s when the constant searching slowly softens.

Not because the pain never mattered.
Not because the relationship meant nothing.

But because the nervous system no longer feels like it has to keep chasing safety from the very place it was wounded.

And maybe that is what closure really is.

And if you are struggling with this too, maybe try asking yourself gently:

“What answer am I still hoping for?”

“What do I believe this explanation or reply would finally give me?”

“And is there a way I can begin giving some of that safety, validation, or closure to myself too?”

Sometimes healing begins there?

Yours,
Hernping

Repost from @ourembodiedhealing • How often do you

Repost from @ourembodiedhealing
•
How often do you allow yourself to directly, honestly name or admit what you’re feeling, without trying to justify it or explain it first?

How often do you censor your own feelings *from your own awareness* because you’re judging and criticizing what you’re feeling as wrong or bad?

How many times do you cut off your feelings before they barely begin, because you don’t like how you feel and want it to change?

How often are you confused or unclear about how you feel, without paying attention long enough to try to put words to what’s happening?

One of the things that reliably supports our nervous system in regulating is connection, and that *includes* connection to ourselves. When we’re able to be radically honest with ourselves about what’s happening for us, we connect with our embodied experience. We orient our system back to present time. We cut through the fog of our trauma responses, by asserting the clarity of what we know right now.

This means naming and admitting the feelings and thoughts that feel uncomfortable, awkward, confusing, shameful, or taboo, even in the silence of our own heads. If we can’t do that, all of the discomfort and shamefulness stays underground, while our nervous system spends a ton of energy pulling out all the stops to protect ourselves…from our own feelings.

By allowing yourself to admit that

I’m pissed…

I hate this…

I don’t like it here…

I don’t know what to say…

I’m really uncomfortable right now…

I don’t know how I feel about this…

I’m scared…

This is too overwhelming…

This isn’t what I want…

I feel so desperate…

I feel so ashamed…

or whatever else is honest and present and true,

you loosen the resistance against what’s active and alive and already here, which can actually, strangely, bring some relief.

Telling yourself the truth gives your nervous system permission to relax its defenses against this very moment. And as unpleasant or painful as this moment can be, that can be grounding and regulating—because you’re no longer pushing away what’s real, you’re less disconnected, and you’re one bit closer to yourself.

#connection #youmatter #trauma #therapy #truth

Repost from @awakenwithally • The body is a teache

Repost from @awakenwithally
•
The body is a teacher in many ways. It teaches us about limits, needs, emotions, our patterns, capacity.

But before it teaches us any of those things, it teaches us how to connect. How to turn toward something without immediately trying to change it. How to become curious about another perspective.

And for many of us, this is not something we know. It’s something we are learning for the first time.

Let your body be a portal through which you learn to connect. With your body, with others, with life.

Love,
Ally.

#body #connection #trauma #therapy #together

Repost from @thebrainlabco • Small steps still com

Repost from @thebrainlabco
•
Small steps still compound to massive changes. Neuroplasticity is concerned with repetition and consistency. Keep going.

#neuroplasticity #action #youmatter #small #steps

Repost from @famimind_ • The grief of loving peopl

Repost from @famimind_
•
The grief of loving people who harmed you is rarely talked about.

Most people assume healing means becoming angry, detached, or indifferent.

But for many survivors of toxic family dynamics, healing is far more complicated than that.

Because the truth is:

You can recognize the harm and still love the people who caused it.

You can miss them and still know distance is necessary.

You can grieve them and still know reconciliation isn’t safe.

One of the most painful parts of healing is realizing that the love you gave could not heal wounds they refused to face.

Not because you didn’t try hard enough.

Not because you weren’t enough.

But because healing is a choice every person must make for themselves.

Many survivors carry guilt for still loving toxic family members.

But love does not erase harm.

And acknowledging harm does not erase love.

Healing often means holding both truths at the same time.

“I love you.”

AND

“You hurt me.”

If this resonates with you, know that you’re not alone in this grief.

❤️ Save this post for the days when missing them makes you question your healing.

❤️ Share it with someone who needs this reminder today.

Love,
Anaishe Rose 🌹

#relationship #trauma #betrayal #alone #therapy

Repost from @awakenwithally • How do you create mo

Repost from @awakenwithally
•
How do you create more internal space around painful patterns?

1. Step back from over-efforting.

You usually know when you’re pushing. When something doesn’t feel right, or when the body starts to backfire after trying too hard. Listen.

2. Orient towards environments where space is mirrored, like nature, the sky, open spaces, and quiet. Let the outside remind your system what spaciousness feels like.

3. Reorient toward what feels a little supportive, nourishing, meaningful, alive, or simply a little easier. Let pleasantness matter too.

This is not bypassing. It’s helping the whole-being experience conditions beyond constant survival and self-fixing.

4. And you can step back from constantly focusing on it and the meaning around it without collapsing into the fear that you’re suppressing or abandoning yourself.

5. Uncouple the pattern from your worth. Just because the pattern is present, it doesn’t mean you are failing, broken, behind, unsafe, or doing something wrong.

A pattern has more space to soften when it no longer has to carry the weight of your worth, too.

6. Start trusting that when the system experiences the right conditions consistently enough, it slowly begins doing what it naturally wants to do in the background: reorganize and integrate the pressure around it.

Maybe your system doesn’t need another thing to heal right now. Maybe it needs more of the conditions that allow it to finally soften and reorganize naturally.

Love,
Ally.

#space #self #recognition #trust #pain

Repost from @frank_andersonmd • Abandonment wounds

Repost from @frank_andersonmd
•
Abandonment wounds don’t always show up as obvious desperation. Sometimes they show up as distance.

Early experiences of inconsistency, loss, emotional absence, or repeated disconnection can shape how the body learns to handle closeness later.

For some people, distance feels unbearable, so they reach, protest, explain, cling, or panic when connection feels threatened.

For others, the adaptation goes in the opposite direction. They learn to need less. Ask for less. Expect less.

They become highly self-reliant, not because they don’t want closeness, but because closeness has brought too much disappointment before.

That’s why abandonment pain can sometimes look like independence from the outside.

It can look like being “fine” when you’re not. Pulling away before anyone gets the chance to leave. Convincing yourself you don’t care, when what you actually learned was that caring gave someone too much power to hurt you.

When abandonment shows up as reaching, clinging, or panicking, most people can recognize the pain underneath. It’s visible.

But when it shows up as independence, calm, or “I’m fine on my own,” it doesn’t always look like a wound. It can look like strength. And that can make it harder to question.

So it may be worth asking honestly: Do you keep people at a distance because you genuinely prefer it, or because some part of you learned that needing someone was too unsafe to risk?

Those two things can feel almost identical from the inside.

#strong #independent #invisible #trauma #betrayal

Repost from @lexyflorentina • At some point it’s i

Repost from @lexyflorentina
•
At some point it’s important to remember that joy is healing. That doing “the work” requires us to not forget about aliveness. And that the whole point to all of this is to build a life in which your body, your emotions and your needs are recognized in your every day life. Not just when they finally get bad enough.

And maybe the most radical thing anyone can do is quietly build a life where all of this exists. Behind the scenes, off the screen, without following the never ending “shoulds” of society. Maybe that’s where we go from just “healing” to living 🫶🏼

#joy #trauma #need #recognition #youmatter

Repost from @iyebiiye • A healthy friendship is no

Repost from @iyebiiye
•
A healthy friendship is not just one that has been around for a long time. It is one that tells you the truth, shows up consistently, celebrates you without condition, and can survive a hard conversation without falling apart. If something on this list felt unfamiliar, that says something. You deserve friendships that actually meet you. All of you.🤍

#friendship #relationships #consistent #youmatter

Repost from @kayatoastforthesoul.sg • “This too sh

Repost from @kayatoastforthesoul.sg
•
“This too shall pass.”

I know people usually mean well when they say this.

And yes, emotions are impermanent.
Pain changes.
Feelings shift.

The intensity we feel now will not always stay this way forever.

But sometimes, when someone is deep inside their pain

Phrases like this can accidentally become dismissive instead of comforting.

—

I remember a conversation where someone was told:

“Emotions are temporary. You shouldn’t be feeling this for so long.”

And the truth is, while the intention may have been to help them not suffer forever,
what they actually felt was misunderstood.

Because when someone is drowning EMOTIONALLY, the last thing they need is PHILOSOPHY.

They need presence.

They need someone who can sit beside the feeling with them before trying to move them out of it.

You see, the person inside the emotion right now often cannot access the wider perspective yet.

To them, the sadness right now now feels endless.
The grief right now feels consuming.
The fear right now feels real.

And healing does not happen by shaming people for feeling too deeply or for “not moving on fast enough.”

Sometimes healing begins with:

“That really hurts.”
“I understand why this affected you.”
“You don’t have to rush yourself out of this feeling.”

Because emotions are not problems to immediately solve.

They are experiences asking to be felt, seen and understood.

Of course, we also don’t want people to lose themselves completely inside their suffering forever.

But there is a difference between gently reminding someone that pain will change someday...

And making them feel wrong for hurting right now.

One creates connection.
The other creates loneliness.

So maybe before we rush to say:
“This too shall pass,”

we first say:

“I’m here with you while it hurts.”

Okay?

Take care,
Hernping

💙

#together #emotions #connection #support #pain

Repost from @thecodependentperfectionist •Words &

Repost from @thecodependentperfectionist
•Words & image by @amythelifecoach

I know how fast this happens because I’ve been there myself.

You say something small and it feels reasonable when you say it. You’re clear, calm and grounded.

And then they react.
It’s not always a big reaction though…Sometimes it’s just a shift in their tone, attitude, a sigh, look or a slight pullback.

But your body registers this shift immediately. It happens before you’ve even had a full thought, then you’re already adjusting.

You begin to soften what you said and explain it differently. “What I meant was…” Then you add context so it lands better or maybe even examples and start taking a little bit of responsibility just to ease the tension because they’re already acting attacked.

You’re not unsure either - you know how you feel and what you’re trying to say but your system learned that when things feel off even just a little bit, it’s your job to make them feel okay again.

So the focus moves from what actually happened…to how quickly you can stabilize the moment.

And the part that gets missed is that you’re not doing that because you’re weak or overly emotional or “bad at communication.”

You’re doing it bc at some point, being connected felt safer than being right. Being understood felt less important than keeping things calm. And someone else’s reaction carried more weight than your own experience.

So now, even when something is valid..even when it matters…even when it should be addressed - your instinct is to resolve the tension first and sort out your feelings later.

This is the moment the work is actually about. Not the boundary itself but the few seconds right after, when everything in you wants to go back and make it easier.

That’s the moment that decides whether you stay with yourself…or leave yourself to keep the environment steady.

And if you’re someone who’s been doing this for a long time, of course it feels uncomfortable to not fix it right away. It feels like you’re being difficult or harsh or dramatic or “too much.”

You’re not!!

You’re just not overriding and abandoning yourself this time. And that’s a completely diff skill than just “speaking up.”

Repost from @hannahfrasermoore • We can, with time

Repost from @hannahfrasermoore
•
We can, with time and support, begin to reconnect with our innate sense of being - our instincts that were once hidden can become seen again.

We can reconnect to our no, to our want for more from this life, to our instinct that refuses to remain silent anymore…

#women #womenempowerment #roar #trauma #therapy

Repost from @earthmonk.guru • I think there comes

Repost from @earthmonk.guru
•
I think there comes a point where you simply say: enough.

Enough of questioning yourself because other people misunderstand you. Enough of shrinking to fit inside somebody else’s limited perception of who you are. Enough of seeing yourself through the eyes of people who never truly saw you in the first place.

Not everybody will understand your heart. Not everybody will recognise your intentions. Not everybody will have the capacity to see your light clearly.

And maybe healing is finally realising that your worth was never supposed to be built on their vision of you anyway.

So I wish you new eyes so that you can see yourself for who you truly are. And to know that you are and always have been enough. Nothing to prove. No one to convince. Just uniquely you and that’s enough.

With love
Fiona
www.earthmonk.guru

#trauma #cptsd #self #enough #asyouare

Repost from @drscottlyons • A lot of us were never

Repost from @drscottlyons
•
A lot of us were never taught that we were allowed to stop.

We were taught to push through.
To be useful.
To take care of everyone else first.

So that became the pattern.
For years.
Sometimes for most of a lifetime.

And now slowing down doesn’t feel restful.
It feels wrong.
Like you’re falling behind or letting someone down.

But that’s not a character flaw.
That’s just what happens when your body learned that stillness wasn’t safe.

The work isn’t forcing yourself to rest.
It’s learning that you’re allowed to.

#selfcompassion #exhaust #keepgoing #stop #trauma

Repost from @nadiaaddesi • You did not come into t

Repost from @nadiaaddesi
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You did not come into this world believing you were hard to love.

That belief was shaped over time. It may have started in moments where love felt conditional. Where being accepted meant staying quiet. Where keeping the peace mattered more than being honest about how much you were hurting.

So overtime you learned how to adjust yourself.

You learned how to become easier for other people.
You learned how to notice every shift in someone’s tone. You learned how to carry things that were never yours to hold.

And eventually, “enough” started to feel like something you had to earn. That is why calm can feel uncomfortable now.

But wanting steady love does not make you needy.

Being unseen by someone else does not mean you lacked value. You are not something that needs to be proven before you are worthy. You already are.❤️

#youareenough #iseeyou #love #steadiness #worth

Have you ever felt so exhausted, overwhelmed by th

Have you ever felt so exhausted, overwhelmed by the seemingly endless pressure - parts of you pushing and pulling in so many directions that nothing but confusion and chaos ensues…

And within all of that confusion and chaos, that pushing and pulling, something in you may be working hard to hold it all together, to be enough in each direction at once, to meet every reach before it becomes a loss.

You can’t stop because stopping might mean seeing, and seeing might mean knowing… knowing what we don’t know.

Yet, what if it is that very not-knowing that keeps us going…

So we keep moving, we keep going, we keep sacrificing, appeasing, masking, and moulding our Self simply to stay acceptable and therefore safe in the relational unbeknownst: because perhaps it feels far safer to remain in the not-knowing than to arrive at what is known.

Perhaps in part this is what the lyrics of the song “Only One” by @citizensoldierofficial might reflect - the parts of us locked inside seeking so desperately for an exit yet struggling in the chaotic undertones of the terror and embodied grief of what was and of what wasn’t… of what is known and of what is not known… yet perhaps most vitally - of simply being known as recognised, worthy, as valuable, and as accepted in all our humanness.

#trauma #burnout #therapy #youareenough #terror

Repost from @hannahfrasermoore • #women #woman #a

Repost from @hannahfrasermoore
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#women #woman #abandoned #dissapointed #alone

Repost from @booksopedia_ • The loneliness nobody

Repost from @booksopedia_
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The loneliness nobody talks about is the loudest kind.

Save this for the moments it gets quiet and too heavy to carry alone 🤍

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Chele Yntema is a Registered Clinical Counsellor and Trauma Specialist.

In the spirit of reconciliation I acknowledges the Traditional Custodians of Country throughout Australia and their connections to land, sea and community. I pay my respect to their Elders past and present and extend that respect to all Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples today. I am committed to inclusion across race, culture, ethnicity, gender, sex, sexuality, religion, and ability. I recognise that people from diverse communities face systemic barriers and seek to challenge the current system and strive for change that makes mental health and wellbeing accessible to and inclusive for all.

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