Articles - Chele Yntema

Hope

Posted on August 17, 2018 by Chele Yntema

I’ve had a bit of an anxiety stirring week, many things not “going my way” - yet as I put some of my anxieties aside and had coffee and a chat with a close friend I realised that even in the mess and chaos, even in my self doubt and...Read More

Home

Posted on August 17, 2018 by Chele Yntema

Sometimes after a long draining day all I need is to be home. To be me, to enjoy being me, and to be still and present in whatever arises within me ❤️🙏🏻 [content_block id=1189 slug=thank-you]

Self Care – do not do what you are “suppose to”

Posted on August 17, 2018 by Chele Yntema

Quite often we find ourselves falling into the trap of doing what we feel we are “supposed to” “have to” or “need to” in the sacrifice of our own needs or of self care. Although sometimes it can be hard to tell those we respect, care about, or even those...Read More

Innate Passion

Posted on July 21, 2018July 21, 2018 by Chele Yntema

I truly believe that when you follow your innate passion the flow of life prevails: time appears to come into fruition, momentum simply flourishes, and what seems like needed discipline becomes anticipation and incitement. From the moment you were just a light in the eye of The Devine an innate...Read More

Awareness

Posted on July 21, 2018July 21, 2018 by Chele Yntema

Listening to an amazing podcast this afternoon I found myself smiling, nodding, and agreeing out loud on the bus! I love the idea of awareness and paying attention to my thoughts without judgment, simply acknowledging their presence and simply allowing them to be... and I love that with dedicated practise...Read More

The Human Heart

Posted on July 16, 2018July 16, 2018 by Chele Yntema

I find the human heart and the heart-brain connection such an immersive topic... I am fascinated at the findings that support what traditions and cultures have known for many moons... Our hearts guide us, they connect with others on levels beyond what we can see, and not only that, we...Read More

The Simple Path

Posted on July 16, 2018July 16, 2018 by Chele Yntema

What does the simple path really mean? After spending a day immersed in the research of potential and what it means to cultivate a life living unto innate destiny, I am inspired more than ever to cultivate a space that fosters simple mindful presence. To make time to acknowledge the...Read More

Peace Within

Posted on July 16, 2018July 16, 2018 by Chele Yntema

"Peace requires something far more difficult than revenge or merely turning the other cheek; it requires empathising with the fears and unmet needs that provide the impetus for people to attack each other. Being aware of those feelings and needs, people lose their desires to attack back because they see...Read More

Codependency

Posted on July 9, 2018July 10, 2018 by Chele Yntema

Codependency can be an overwhelming, negative, and sometimes toxic cycle in relationships. Have you ever wondered why sometimes no matter how hard to try to help others, they seem to remain a victim? Or perhaps you feel as though others often continually treat you as someone who is forever in...Read More

Sense Making

Posted on July 7, 2018July 16, 2018 by Chele Yntema

While I know the virtue of sense making, there is a lot of things in my life that are yet to make sense. Yet, the more I take the time in self compassion to sift through the inner workings of my mind, the more I realise just how important this...Read More

Belonging

Posted on July 7, 2018July 16, 2018 by Chele Yntema

I have always had a sense of belonging as “home” - so much so that in the depths of my trauma I can remember crying out “I just want to go home”... I resonate with the theory and practise that highlights the importance of our generations past. Of both the...Read More

One of Those Days

Posted on July 6, 2018July 16, 2018 by Chele Yntema

Today was one of those days. One of those days where I have been overcome with feelings of “failure”. Of “not good enough”, of “the mum not coping”, and a day of self judgment that radiates into behaviours that leave me ashamed of who I am. Yet, at the same...Read More

Black and White: The Truth is Paradoxical

Posted on July 6, 2018July 16, 2018 by Chele Yntema

I think sometimes it is easy to forget that while life is often very black and white, life can also be seen as black or white with a spectrum of colours within and between... Though sometimes it is hard, I do wonder, what would it be like for you to...Read More

Faith

Posted on July 6, 2018July 16, 2018 by Chele Yntema

Faith is knowing nothing is certain but trusting anyway... How to we learn to trust? What does it mean to have faith? Is faith only for story books? It seems, sometimes, that we live in an epoch in time where control is in the forefront of all that is done....Read More

Family

Posted on July 6, 2018July 16, 2018 by Chele Yntema

I am learning more and more about the interconnected nature of family. Specifically, while the past has a strong influence on us holistically, it doesn’t have to keep us trapped. Everything from the expression of an individual’s DNA and the future of what it means to break perpetual cycles of...Read More

Understanding Hate

Posted on July 6, 2018July 16, 2018 by Chele Yntema

Dr Henry Cloud writes that hate is a part of what defines us and as such we need to understand hate. And while at first it seems a notion to be weary of, I resonate with the concept and believe it really does. Dr Cloud goes on to remind...Read More

Emotions

Posted on July 2, 2018July 2, 2018 by Chele Yntema

There is a flow of energy and information within ourselves and within our relationships that requires us to pay attention in times of change. Often when an emotion arises we are not quite sure what to make of it, so sometimes we choose to suppress it. Yet, if we choose...Read More

Justification of Judgement

Posted on July 2, 2018 by Chele Yntema

Have you ever been drawn in to the justification of judgement? Listening to a podcast by @soundstrue whereby Gabriel Bernstein spoke of the powerful draw of judgment. I often find myself being drawn into judgment without realising that, underneath it there is a projection of a self judgment and an aversion of...Read More

A Mindful Minute of Gratitude

Posted on June 22, 2018 by Chele Yntema

A Mindful Minute of Gratitude - I always enjoy natures beauty. I love the captivating colours of this video and the way it immerses my entire being into a feeling a gratitude for our earth. Nature’s beauty can be fleeting -- but not through Louie Schwartzberg’s lens. His stunning time-lapse...Read More

Survival

Posted on May 28, 2018 by Chele Yntema

How do we survive? There is no separating the self from other. Nor the need to join together in compassionate care. No matter how much sometimes it seems like this world is in turmoil, with chaos and confusion, maliciousness and miscommunication, blame, shame and condemnation running rife, I truly believe...Read More

Judgment

Posted on May 28, 2018 by Chele Yntema

This week I found myself feeling judged. Yet, as I took the time to compassionately understand my feelings I realised that I was the only one judging myself. The feelings of judgment I felt came from an embedded schema of “not good enough” and my own internal awareness (and pressure)...Read More

Culture

Posted on May 28, 2018 by Chele Yntema

I love learning about my families heritage and appreciating the culture I came from, as well as the many cultures I have been immersed in within my lifetime. It is an amazing thing to delve into your past and to create a sense of self based in a relationally rich...Read More

Misbehaviour

Posted on May 28, 2018May 28, 2018 by Chele Yntema

I wonder sometimes if we mistake children’s messages as misbehaviours? Are emotional outbursts misconstrued as “wrong” rather than a request for an underlying need? Or perhaps there are stressors in children we do not quite understand or relate to? Stressors that leave our children with the need for more overt...Read More

Life is a Verb

Posted on May 28, 2018 by Chele Yntema

Life is a Verb, not a noun Sometimes when I feel overwhelmed I hear the words “I can’t do this” mindlessly exiting my mouth... At the same time there is a knowing within me that seems to just persevere even in the deepest of grief. I was reminded this morning...Read More

Vulnerability

Posted on May 28, 2018 by Chele Yntema

My heart broke a little this week... and I ended up having “one of those days” all week... Today is one of those days. One of those days I wish the world would just stop. One of those days where I wish things could be different. One of those days...Read More

Should

Posted on May 28, 2018 by Chele Yntema

Quite often I find myself so fixated on what I “should” have done; what I “should” be doing; or even “it shouldn’t be this way!”; I forget that the sensations or emotions that arise before the judgement of “should” are simply measures of movement or indicators of change. Instead of...Read More

Light

Posted on May 28, 2018 by Chele Yntema

Eloquently spoken words encapsulating the true essence of my values. We are all meant to shine ☀ You are born to manifest what is within you, to be liberated into who you are. Honour yourself and your dreams. You are worth it. Listen to this amazing podcast on Sounds True...Read More

Speak Out

Posted on May 28, 2018 by Chele Yntema

Never stay silent when a friend is in need. Remember, words spoken against someone: social rejection, has the power to activate the same area of the brain as harmful physical actions. Protect the ones you love. Be assertive, yet compassionate.

Against Punishment

Posted on May 28, 2018 by Chele Yntema

I often struggle with how to set boundaries with my little girl. At the same time I have become so aware that most of the time her behaviours come from a very real need to both connect and be seen. So I am practicing more and more lately to pause...Read More

Attention

Posted on May 28, 2018 by Chele Yntema

My favourite saying from Dr Dan Siegel! “What that means is that where you help a child focus attention, like on their internal state or for empathy on the state of another person or family member or yourself —“Here’s what I’m feeling right now”—you’re stimulating neuronal activation. You don’t have...Read More

Loss

Posted on May 28, 2018 by Chele Yntema

Grief and loss is not just an experience of the mind - it is an experience within our entire identity, a pain that penetrates into the depths of our physical, psychological, and relational being...

Should

Posted on May 28, 2018 by Chele Yntema

I wonder what it would be like each time you “should” yourself or another to non judgmentally ask “can I accept this moment for what it is?” Instead of wishing for or expecting instant change in self or in another, accept the present or the past, or others opinions. To...Read More

Risking it all

Posted on May 28, 2018May 28, 2018 by Chele Yntema

Have you ever had to risk it all? There have been a few times in my life where I have had to give up everything. The funny thing is, each time it wasn’t really because I wanted to, or because I was oriented toward success. It was because the need...Read More

Did You Know?

Posted on May 28, 2018May 28, 2018 by Chele Yntema

Love yourself and your kids healthy... “genetic factors are not the final repository of all information in the health status of an organism. We now call many disorders as lifestyle problems. Abnormal lifestyle has given rise to a host of problems and if we can change the anomalous lifestyle (through...Read More

Did You Know?

Posted on May 28, 2018May 28, 2018 by Chele Yntema

Did you know? Silence relieves stress and tension. Silence replenishes our mental resources. In silence, we can tap into the brain’s default mode network. Getting quiet can regenerate brain cells. Source: Huffington Post - Why Silence Is So Good For Your Brain

Case Study: A Spiritual Identity Crisis

Posted on May 28, 2018June 30, 2021 by Chele Yntema

In the darkest depths of my own lost identity I once said, “Hope knows the sun has risen even when the clouds cover every ray of light”. I wonder why it is that as humans we question pain and suffering so intently, yet we continue on? Where does our endurance...Read More

Our Memory is More…

Posted on May 21, 2018May 21, 2018 by Chele Yntema

I am blessed to have a good memory. Yet at the same time I must continually cultivate and cherish it with respect. I have learned that although my memory is a gift, it is a gift that requires me to continually be mindfully present and to acknowledge the act of...Read More

The Demeaning Clutch of “Should”

Posted on May 12, 2018 by Chele Yntema

WoW! A biopsychosocial model of holistic wellbeing

Posted on May 12, 2018August 14, 2020 by Chele Yntema

A Counselling conceptualisation and intervention based on a Wheel of Wellness. Though often it may not be recognised as such, suffering – psychological, physiological, and even cultural – is an entity: an energy that exists within and between the dimensions of human wholeness. This energy is an enigma with a...Read More

The four D’s of Disconnection

Posted on May 4, 2018May 4, 2018 by Chele Yntema

Disconnection can be seen as something that has the potential to create chaotic or rigid behaviour - often this behaviour comes across as anger, frustration, depression, anxiety, or the like. I wonder... have you ever been in the situation where a conversation turns defensive? Could it be that one of...Read More

Heart rate variability correlates to the magnetic fields of the earth!

Posted on May 4, 2018May 4, 2018 by Chele Yntema

Fascinating! The results [of a recent study] support the hypothesis that the slow wave rhythms in heart rate variability can synchronize with changes in local magnetic field data, and that the degree of synchronization is affected by the quality of interpersonal relationships.

Holistic Wellbeing: A Biospychosocial Perspective

Posted on April 12, 2018August 14, 2020 by Chele Yntema

Since the dawn of human civilization, injuries, infections and other historically identified ailments have been prevalent concerns for the individual and the masses. Indeed, ancient texts speak of humans as holistic beings whereby body, mind, spirit and kinship work harmoniously to create an integrated inherent balance that can be reflected...Read More

A life worth living: The potential within

Posted on January 14, 2018January 14, 2018 by Chele Yntema

Though I have been troubled, I am not distressed; though I have been perplexed, anguish eluded me; though persecuted, not forsaken; subjugated, but not destroyed; I have felt what it was like to be in dire need… And so I now know, faith in spite of doubt, hope in spite...Read More

The Issue is not The Issue: Interpersonal Conflict and How to Resolve it

Posted on December 20, 2017June 27, 2024 by Chele Yntema

The Issue is not The Issue: Interpersonal Conflict Originally featuring in a book by William Steig (1990) about identity and becoming, the character Shrek and accompanying protagonists, Donkey and Fiona, were swept up by DreamWorks and converted into characters of minimal depth whereby stereotypical anxious, ambivalent, and avoidant attachments create...Read More

My Innate Disposition: understanding my past in truth, creating coherent narrative, and coming to identity

Posted on November 27, 2017 by Chele Yntema

All alone, I sat waiting. I was lost. It was not that I did not know where I was, nor where I was going, nor even where I had come from… No, it was deeper than that. Lost was a sadness that penetrated so deep within me that my very...Read More

Interpersonal Trauma

Posted on November 21, 2017 by Chele Yntema

Introduction Although at times western society may portray that the essence of significance is individualism, there is an undeniable inherent connection between the “relational self” (Siegel, 2012, pp. 348 - 349) and a life in which we are able to attain well-being, meaning, and assurance in spite of pain. Yet,...Read More

Positive Psychology

Posted on November 19, 2017June 27, 2024 by Chele Yntema

Analysis, discussion, and framework of Positive Psychology in Counselling In a life where paradoxes are continual and individuals are dynamic yet holistic, experience is a vast entailment not only of aspects that bring about trials, tribulations and the emotions that radiate from fear; but equally of an innate human capacity...Read More

True Self Vs False Self

Posted on May 2, 2016May 2, 2018 by Chele Yntema

FROM BROKENNESS TO WHOLENESS HEALING THROUGH FAITH, HOPE, AND LOVE Identity and the relentless search for self in any paradigm has been a pertinent part of society since Adam and Eve chose to gain the wisdom that broke the sanctity of their child like innocence (Gen 3, NIV; Bible Gateway,...Read More